Forbidden Love of Jedi
by claws2501
Summary: Set during the clone wars there is a battle which has led to the death of many clones.As expected in normal warfare Palpatine makes a surprise visit along with the leader of the neutral systems and the Naboo ntains Anakin*Padme and Obiwan*Satine
1. Chapter 1

Forbidden Love of the Jedi

**A/N this is set during the clone wars, it starts with a battle on a planet in the outer rims (yet to be named) whihc has led to the deaths of many clones. It contains anakin*Padme and also Obi Wan*Satin because the couple fit so well together and why does anakin have to be the bad Jedi? So anyway please read and review to tell me if worth continueing **

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><p>Anakin and his former master were crouched behind some speeders left behind by the locals in a desperate attempt to flee the planets main urban area as war had, almost inevitably come. All around were the screams of dying or injured men. Yes, men Anakin though grimly, other generals and Jedi might consider them clones- devoid of any real though, programmed only to follow orders. But, as you got to know them, in a way a general could possibly know his troops it was clear that this so called programming had failed on an epic scale.<p>

"Master?" Anakin asked he could practically here the cogs whirring in Obi-Wan's brain as he tried to figure something out- he got no reply. "Master" he all but yelled at him wrenching him around to face him. "We have to go" Anakin screamed, leaping to his feet and running out of the safety the abandoned speeders promised, dragging Obi-Wan with him and running parallel to the front formed where the armies of clones finished and no man's land begun. Behind them, where they had been nearly seconds before a bomb, or grenade Anakin couldn't tell which, exploded lifting them off their feet and throwing them towards the cover Anakin had been heading to. They landed hard about half a foot away when Obi-Wan, sensing danger had come out of deep meditation, a state which nearly always forced Anakin to risk his own life to protect him.

"Anakin we can win this" he said triumphantly as if he was still a padiwan being the first to answer a particularly difficult question. However instead of being rewarded with praise he got Anakin's 'look'. This look had been employed ever since he had been the little child just starting Jedi training. Its meaning was a clear today had it had been all those years ago: Anakin thought that this time his master had really lost it, still Anakin was happy to go along with the plan, not because of a bond of trust but because he desperately wanted this battle over before it took anymore lives. It was the worst he and his regiment the 501st had been in since Christophis. He nodded once and beckoned two clones over who had been gallantly fire away from the two generals as the spoke tactics. Dropping to the ground they dove for the cover, behind them another two clones took over. Everyone in the regiment knew that if the generals stopped fighting it was never a good sign and everything must be done to ensure the tactical planning happened and ensured that the regiment as a whole would live to fight another. This was meant in a very literal sense.

"Yes General" they responded in unison.

"General Kenobi thinks we can win this" he shouted as the sound of heavy artillery became insistently louder and the chatter of machine guns answered that of the other sides. The two clones looked at each other and Obi-Wan smiled- they didn't think he could do it either. The glance, for that was all it was, was quick and the clones, forever the soldiers, or maybe just desperate men clutching and straws, stiffened and threw their laser weapons across their chest. "What do you want us to do?" Cody asked.

"We need to fall the men back as if retreating" stated obi-wan. Suddenly, as if a light switch had been thrown on in his head Anakin realised what Obi-Wan was planning. Oh dear he thought quietly please Force he begged not let it be what I think it is. He knew it would work, but, the jokey part of Anakin, the piece of the 9 year-old slave boy that forgot to grow up really didn't think that the plan was cause for celebration.

"With due respects General" Rex interrupted and then stopped, this was the first time he had even questioned an order- it just wasn't done by clones but these generals made him feel more human. they almost expected this of him, it was just a question of when Rex was, as the clone leader of the 501st ready to throw away everything the clones had been made for: to obey orders. He was now ready, he now understood the need for the generals to be questioned, it didn't disrupt the battle, didn't slow down decision making, and yet it did save troops lives. . "We fought all day for this few feet of ground and now you expect us to throw it away? Troops have died today, good honest troops" his voice had started off as meek but had grown stronger. Obi-Wan smiled the smile of a general giving promise to his men- it was silent and the in the situation both officer and man found themselves in forced it to be brief. Beside Rex, the other prominent, almost deputy leader of the 501st was flabbergasted at the way Rex was challenging the commands of the general, even though he entirely understood where Rex was coming from; he just wasn't ready to admit to it yet.

"Yes" Obi-Wan replied acknowledging the point, he glance at Anakin to see if he too had worked out what he had though out- he nodded in affirmation, there was no need to ask what the glance meant, they were so close that they knew automatically without thinking what the other was saying. Anakin took over the briefing, it was in his nature to be much better at giving orders to the troops primarily because he could manipulate the atmosphere around him to his likening, giving worn out battle weary troops fire in their belly to carry on. It had been because of this why he had been so valuable to Watto, as a young slave boy he frequently was able to rip other dealers off for products by 'convincing' them that actually it was a good deal. Around the small group huddled begin what used to be a house the battle raged the droids cutting down clones and clones firing down droids. It was stalemate. It had been since the previous mornings advances were halted by reinforcements on the enemies' part and the lack of republic air cover.

"This street is narrow" Anakin stated "Which is why we chose it for one to one combat?" this time it was a question directed at the clones to see if, thus far they agreed with him. They nodded, Cody muttering a 'Yes sir' under his breath. "Well if we pull troops back and load this street with grenades..." he trailed off sensing understanding from the troops, Cody continued.

"They will chase us and get blown up" he said sighing happily at the prospect of the battle being over soon, beside him hung his head in shame.

"Rex" Obi-Wan said calmly "We always need people to question our orders for us to reconsider" he warmly put a hand on the trooper's shoulder Rex nodded brightening a little "Good now all agreed it is a good plan?" The troopers nodded and they quickly set about putting the plan into action.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello again readers- thanks to sordorland for reviewing my work it really heartens me- as a writer to see that people enjoy my work. but equally I would really want to know how I can improve so, if any of you guys read and no like my work I also really want to hear from you. So enough from me (for now anyway) and crack on with the story hope you enjoy and please review. **

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><p>Cody jumped up from behind cover yelling into his mike in his helmet, relaying it to all troops in combat.<p>

"Prepare for evacuation" the clones didn't dispute this and didn't even glance up at Cody for a reason why- they were trained far too well. The protocol for extraction was to leave troopers too injured to get up themselves behind, however Anakin and Obi-Wan, sick of their soldiers being treated worst than the pack mules had a new protocol which was now always used by the 501st which guaranteed less losses. It put him and Obi-Wan in more danger, but they didn't mind. Around the two Jedi the droids pushed forwards following the slow retreating army. The two Jedi then launched out of their hiding place. They spread themselves across the narrow front; this is where the fun begins Anakin thought grimly. He wasn't complaining, ever since he was a small boy he had lived for the challenge, first from pod-racing now- during warfare- this was about as challenging as it got.

They started deflecting bullets, this time not only directed at them but also every other one as well. It was this that was new to the 501st protocol, and it gave Cody and Rex a chance to organize the stretcher to get injured troops to safety. Many Jedi frowned upon this practice thinking that it displayed signs of attachment from the Jedi to the rest of their troops. However both Anakin and Obi-Wan still continued with or without the Council's permission. It pushed the pair to their limit of their capabilities- the plan wasn't fall proof and every so often a stray laser bolt shot through the Jedi wall of defence killing another man- but on paper as statistics the 501st always counted more men in than any other regiment across the clone army- this further convinced the Jedi that, although frowned upon the tactic actually worked. As the Army retreated the flanks started to place the detonators on various walls, more so than necessary required but in the clones eyes it was better to be safe than sorry.

So far Obi-Wan thought quietly the plan was working perfectly- the two Jedi up front were slowly moving back and were almost out of the secluded narrow alley that had been up to a few minutes ago part of a major front. The droids- sensing a supposedly easy victory loomed down on them- squeezing the last tanks they had down the narrow street in single file. Rex ran up to the front- very nearly hit by a blaster bolt only to duck just before if hit.

"Generals" Rex said, yelling over the blaster noise and the insistent hum of the light sabres. The two men glanced over to the clone, a brief acknowledgment and, for Rex, permission to continue. "We have the injured out- its time to go" As soon as he had said this he disappeared to not willing to linger as he still, under his helmet burned with shame from events previous. The two generals turned as one and ran after him deflecting blaster bolts over their shoulders. Seeing their quarry on the run the tanks increased in speed, fitting nearly the entire line in the alley.

"This is it Anakin" Obi-Wan said quietly, his voice, as usual hiding the nervousness which he felt. What if his plan failed? He glanced around. The troops were looking at him expectantly. Watching. Waiting. Watching. There was no time to think about the anxiety now- it was much too late for doubts. Suddenly his master's voice came to him repeating words from so long ago.

"Don't centre on your anxiety Obi-Wan" Suddenly he felt a presence in his mind, it soothed him back to the normal, calm self. He glanced at Anakin wondering if he too could feel this calming presence to see him smile slightly. It was his normal boyish grin, more like a smirk. Damn Anakin Obi-Wan thought passionately. Why did he have to be the only Jedi master who wasn't strong enough to stop his padiwan using mind tricks? Beside him Anakin spoke, bringing him out from his deep thinking.

"Ready when you are" he replied, holding up a unit with a single red button on it. It was the unit which Cody had given him and was set to prime and then detonate the mixture of bombs and grenades left in the alley. Obi-Wan nodded both in acknowledgement of Anakin speaking and answering without words that he was ready. Quickly Anakin pushed the button. Nothing happened. Another moment of delay. The silence seemed endless as the two armies stared each other down. The men looked at each other worriedly- not just Anakin and Obi-Wan but across their entire platoon, everyone knew that if this didn't work they would have to surrender or die. Clearly the separatists realised this too as many droids came out from the protection their tanks promised them to look at the famous 501st and the two Jedi which led it. Then the whole world was turned upside down.

The high explosives exploded with an ear splitting roar. The high rise buildings which loomed over the alley contained the blast forcing towards the rest of the now dwindling separatist army. But also back the other way. Suddenly the Jedi realised just how much danger they were now in. They tried to run, using the force to enhance their speed, but to no avail. The explosion picked them up as if rag dolls throwing them away from the alley and towards the republics heavy artillery. Obi-Wan got blown into a canon with incredible velocity; he crumpled down and lay still. Meanwhile Skywalker miraculously missed the canons but barrelled straight into the brick wall which lay behind them. He lay where he fell. Unmoving. The clones however, with reflexes which reviled that of a Jedi's had found cover, many dragging injured brothers with them. As the noise died down and the smoke cleared Cody and Rex hurried from their hiding place to check on the generals, still lying where they had fallen. The other clones quickly got into fighting stances their weapons primed ready to provide cover fire should the need have aroused. It didn't.

"General Skywalker" Cody shouted in his ear, shaking him slightly. Slowly the younger man began to wake up- still groggy from his spout of unconsciousness.

"Padmé?" he asked still confused- he thought he was back on Naboo during their wedding. Suddenly it became much clearer to him as his memory slowly returned. And with his memory came the horror of the mistake he had made merely seconds before. With horror his eyes found and focused on the man who had brought him out of revive. His eyes narrowed as he took in Cody's shocked and embarrassed face. He mentally cursed himself. Why couldn't clones be droids? He asked savagely. Then he set to pondering what he would do about Cody.

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><p><strong>Hello again guys just thought I would remind you of a button down here which says review on it and I welcome both positive and negative reviews so that I A) can improve my work and B) next time someone reads it they will be much more likely to enjoy reading fanfiction as much as I enjoy writing it. Also want to say a big thanks to those who have added me to their alerts. You guys know who you are and thanks xx. I hope to update either later today (GMT) or tomorrow at the latest. til then bai.<br>**


	3. Chapter 3

**okay- this is it, the one you have been waiting for (cue drum roll) the next chapter of the story (drum roll stops) thanks to all those wonderfall reviews from sodorland and Mo Angel and also readers who have taken the time to read my work- you guys know who you are and thank you. So i best stop talking otherwise I and you will be here all day. Enjoy the story XD  
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><p>Elsewhere Rex gently shook the other general awake, both oblivious to the potential drama and scandal unfolding just metres away.<p>

"General" Rex said uncertainly, Obi-Wan's eyes snapped open. Unseeing at first, but slowly he focused on Rex. Confusion crossed his face as he took in the trooper's smiling face but it was brief, a fleeting moment of freedom. Soon replaced by a mask all Jedi wore in the face of uncertainty, honed from a young age as younglings, not wanting to displease their masters' sought to hide their struggles from the rest of the group. Qui-Gon had always encouraged to be emotional, but teaching from other masters had proved much more influential on that topic.

"Rex" Obi-0Wan acknowledged, looking around slowly as his memory started coming back to him. With his memory his mask slipped again and a worried expression carved itself onto his face. "The bomb" Obi-Wan started stopping as he saw Rex's grin get wider, he reopened his mouth to speak but stopped as Rex raised a hand to shush him.

"It worked General" he said quickly not quite believing he had once again spoken out of turn and saying it quickly somehow makes it alright. The general nodded in relief. Then the memory of the bomb exploding hit him hard.

"Anakin..." he said, it was neither a question nor statement but rather something in between. He made to getup. In any normal circumstance Rex would've stopped him- insisting that he should rest, but Rex knew that if the situations had been reversed he would want to go and see to his friend and companion first. Even so both officer and man were surprised when Rex extended his hand to offer help. Obi-Wan looked at him with gratitude and new found respect, something which Rex wasn't sure he deserved. The Jedi master seized Rex's wrist. Rex's hand also tightened around the General's wrist pulled backwards, lifting the older man up. Once he was on his feet he appeared to be much more stable- but not entirely. Rex shot out his hands to help him but then stopped. Once again he forced himself into the shoes of the older commander. He snapped his hands back as quickly as he could. Obi-Wan once again looked at him gratitude sparkling in his eyes. He suddenly understood why his former master had refused help from Obi-Wan in his moments of weakness.

It wasn't about pride-well not entirely. All their lives Jedi were taught to be independent and never form attachments, not just as husbands or wives, but to each other. The so-called close knit community of the Jedi was strange and complex, yes, they knew everything about the others but none were allowed to lay their lives down for the other- it was against the rules. Being attached meant being dependent on something- amongst other things. Rex helping him now would strip that independence from him. He wasn't ready for that yet- and Rex, in part understood this.

Luckily Anakin lay just a few feet away and it didn't take long for him to reach his former padiwan. Cody stood up and snapped a quick salute. Obi-Wan raised his first two fingers next to his thumb and placed them on his right side of his brow in a half hearted kind of salute. He hated the militaristic ways of life which came with leading a battalion of clones into war. In some ways, although he hated to admit it, even to himself, he agreed with his padiwan's view on the way the war should be run. However unlike his padiwan he understood the need for the Jedi to be leaders. Anakin, the senate and every other person educated or not thought that the war was, in a way purely political. They knew that the armies were fighting for peace and democracy, but it wasn't about protection from the separatists- well some of it was. But there was a legend behind it. So old that the origins had long since been lost- it was the fight between Sith and Jedi- hidden in the background not even the chancellor knew about it.

"General" Cody said, looking at Rex in a silent question about the general's fitness to handle bad news. Rex in answer nodded and quickly followed it up with a non-committable shrug of the shoulders. Obi-Wan watched with slight un-Jedi-like irritation each minute he could feel his strength ebbing from his body, and here they were wasting what the Jedi masters would call valuable time discussing his fitness.

"How is Anakin?" he asked desperately wanting news which wasn't about him.

"He's..." Cody started and then stopped, then started again; "He woke up just now- but he just blacked out again" Quickly Rex crouched down next to the seemingly lifeless body of Anakin Skywalker. He checked the pulse and then leant in to listen to the Knights chest. He sighed with relief as he heard the faint rattle of breath and felt against his cheek the rhythmic rise and fall of his chest.

"He's showing signs of vitals" Rex said glancing up at Obi-Wan and suddenly every man in that group realised just how much Anakin meant to everyone who had had the fortune to have him in their lives. He had been like ever since he was the small scared slave boy from Watto's shop in the outer rims. But it ran deeper than that- if, like Obi-Wan they believed in Jedi folk lore- he was the chosen one to bring balance to the force. He can't die now.

"General" Cody's voice cut through the still twilight air like a knife. Obi-Wan looked up, tearing his eyes away from the boy, no; Obi-wan corrected himself, young man lying on the floor who still had so much to give to life. "Who is Padmé?" he asked. Obi-Wan froze still like animal caught in a head light. And, like a wolf who had sensed its prey he turned towards Cody. He quickly rounded on the solider.

"How did you come by that name?" he all but growled at the clone. Cody looked uncertainly at Rex and to the unconscious Anakin before looking fearfully back into the eyes of the rarely angered General Kenobi.

"General Skywalker called me it" he replied glancing at the floor not wanting to see those eyes again, and also because he just realised that maybe he had betrayed the commander's closest secret.

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><p><strong>Hello again readers- me again- i just thought i might remind you of the review button which is just (*Arrow downwards*) rite here. please click on it and provide some feed back for me. Thanks. Easter break almost over but I will still be updating frequently. Until next time avid readers ;P <strong>


	4. Chapter 4

**Hiya avid reader- here is the next installment of Forbidden Love of Jedi- I would like to thank Jedi Master Misty Sman-Esay CM and StarWarsNerdGirl for your lovely reviews it really does encourage writers to wrtie. So anyway keep reading and don't forget to review**

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><p>Obi-Wan stopped and quickly cursed himself for his apparent lack of self-control. "I'm sorry Cody" he apologized, in response Cody looked curiously at the general but the expression was gone quickly. Replacing it was a smooth bank exterior.<p>

"That's okay sir" he said evenly, even his voice betrayed nothing. A long silence stretched before them. It was broken not by someone but by something. A shuttle, big and sleek, it was obvious the leader was wealthy or influential. Obi-Wan recognized it as a Neubian T-95. He looked at Rex and Cody. The arrival of this type of ship could only mean one thing: politics.

"Men" Obi-Wan said quietly, his volume made it clear he was only talking to the two commanders present. The phrase also changed the clone's behaviour. IT turned them back into mindless droids- it unnerved Obi-Wan.

"Sir" They said in perfect unison stiffening up to the attention position.

"Prepare your men- we have visitors" he replied back. They nodded quickly and turned to the right before marching back to the makeshift camp which had sprung up while that had been trying to revive Anakin. Obi-Wan turned back to Anakin and crouched next to him. He landed heavily on the floor, his legs unable to support his weight any longer. His fall, although denting his pride did manage to wake Anakin up who groaned out loud.

"Master?" Anakin said uncertainly. Obi-Wan sighted in relief. This prompted the Jedi knight to look at him curiously. He searched his memory for a reason for his master to be worried he came to a halt at what he said to Cody not one hour ago. Could his master know? Surely not! Obi-Wan watched Anakin struggle to understand his emotions with some emotions.

"Politics" he answered. This confused the young man further, but did reassure him, at the same time. Maybe, just maybe Cody didn't accidently betray him, unless his master was saving a lecture for another date.

"Politics?" he asked back, not understanding, rubbing his head for the last time he stood up, using the brick wall behind him as an aid, not only to lever him up but to hold him steady. Obi-Wan opened his mouth to speak but as he did the slick Neubian craft landed. Anakin's face contorted into a wish of emotions that Obi-Wan couldn't see any of them- there was just too many to pick out any one. Then as quickly as they had all come they were gone, his face left blank. Not just the face but the eyes to- completely devoid of any emotion at all. Obi-Wan was shocked. Anakin's control over his emotions was unreal.

The hot flushes of anger were pure and uncontrollable, and it was in his nature to be stubborn and head strong. Suddenly Obi-Wan realised what he had thought- those two words 'stubborn and head strong' were the same two words Qui-Gon had used to describe him to the council. Maybe it was a curse for masters to always see the worst in their subjects. Obi-Wan also realised that he wasn't just controlling his emotions through body language but also his force signature was registering completely blank of emotions. Obi-Wan shook his head, and, putting his troublesome apprentice to the back of his mind he returned the subject at hand.

The craft was sleek and powerful- designed to give maximum speed and also comfort. The metallic exterior reflected the little light produced by the moons around the landing zone, lighting the place up better than flood lights would. The landing ramp came down and began to unfold itself spilling the harsh white light of the new type holo-laterns, forcing both Jedi to shield their eyes.

At the entrance appeared 3 figures, the harsh light darkened their features but, as they stepped out it was clear who they were. In the centre stood Palpatine, the chancellor of the Republic and on either side stood two women. Both were dressed in simple garb, and both carried blasters at their hips. The only difference was their features, one had long following dark hair which she had tied back into a pony tail and then platted, and she had a tanned complexion and brown eyes. She moved with the air of confidence that she could look after herself without the help of the security provided in the form of the chancellor's body guards. They were the only part of the Galactic army which weren't clones, and as a result both factions distasted each other. The other girl was the opposed with pointy features and fair skin. She looked, almost uncomfortable in the war zone and looked to the other girl for both support and leadership. The blaster at her hip rested unnaturally and when she took a closer look around she shrank towards the blue clad warriors which flanked the group.

The two Jedi, rather unsteadily, Obi-Wan limping and Anakin moving with his back slightly bent out of place moved forward meeting them at the midpoint between the brick walls and the ship.

"Senator Amidala, Duchess" Anakin said bowing before flashing a grin at the Senator.

"Chancellor" Obi-Wan greeted the most powerful man with another bow. The chancellor bowed back, but it was senator Amidala who greeted the Jedi.

"Master Jedi" She said formally, she noticed with narrow eyes the way Anakin's back was bent out of place and also noticed fresh scratches and bruises from the last time he had been on leave, or as the Jedi called it 'meditative retreat'. She also noticed the way her friend had realized while looking at Obi-Wan and made a mental note to ask her about it later. Silence stretched between the two parties before it was broken by the chancellor.

"Well I don't know if you have met the duchess of Mandalore, Satine Kyrze, she is head of the Council of Neurtral systems" As he finished he stepped back followed by the senator so that the Duchess stood forward. Obi-Wan and Satine looked at each other for a long time. Quite and contemplating. Beside him Anakin felt his Force signature change to become much more relaxed. Strange he thought and glanced at his wife Padmé who merely shrugged. It was at that point that Anakin decided to uncover the truth between the Jedi and politician. Some might have said this was stupid but Anakin Skywalker lived for a challenge.

"We are well acquainted" Obi Wan told an unsurprised Palpatine he glanced at Anakin. "Both of us are". He glared at the younger Knight until Anakin repeated his greeting.

"Duchess" he paused "I am glad to once again be at your service". The duchess didn't look at him when she replied.

"Thank you General Skywalker" she said her voice was laced with disdain it was not directed at Anakin but merely at the weapon which hung in full view on his hip. Anakin shrugged, thanks to Padmé he had learnt how to deal with other politicians and he employed Rule number 1: being kind to your enemies annoyed them.

"No...No the pleasure is all mine" he said, he smiled triumphantly as he saw annoyance and the surprise flit across the Duchess' face. Padmé merely glared at him and for the second time tension crushed onto the group and crackled in the air. Satine nodded once and then stepped back. Palpatine took over and as quickly as it had come the tension lifted.

"Master Jedi" he said looking at Obi-Wan who acknowledged him with a small incline. "We have an order to convince the Mandalorians to join our cause. Surprise flitted across Obi-Wan's face but was quickly reigned in. "We would like to inspect the troops" the chancellor finished. Obi-Wan nodded, the event was, a surprise, but it would take a lot to de-stable a man with patience to rival Master Yoda himself.

"With due respects" Obi-Wan started "We have just come out of a major battle" he stopped considering what he could say next- the situation was very fragile, but, Anakin as always was way ahead of him.

"What he means is" he said, coughing slightly as he inhaled some residue smoke left over from the explosion earlier. "That we would be happy to accompany you buy my master was seriously injured in battle today and would like to rest and recover, but I can show you around" he glanced out dramatically.

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><p><strong>Dun dun daaaaa to be continued (don't forget to review please)<br>**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello again avid readers, and welcome to new ones, well sorry for the long wait but it is finally over. A nice long chapter this time just because of the wait which I made you wait- I'm sure it was painfull. Well thank you all to the lovely reviews that I have been recieving. Review and have your name posted here (even if it is a bad one) so now I shan't make you wait any longer- on with the story...  
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><p>Obi-Wan flashed him a gratefully and for once did not reprimand him for interrupting. To the politicians he nodded in agreement to Anakin's words.<p>

"If you don't mind Chancellor I would like to excuse myself". In response to Obi-Wan's conferment of having sustained quite serious injuries the two women glanced at each other reassuringly. Or rather, Padmé was reassuring Satine. Why did she look so worried? Anakin asked himself silently. Palpatine merely smiled and clasping his hands together bowed with respect to the senior Jedi.

"Certainly General" he replied, glancing almost knowingly at Satine and then to Obi-Wan again, who was now, once again the cool calm, collective general and Jedi master that he always was. He nodded to Anakin, briefly placing a hand on the younger man's shoulder. It was comfort for the younger General. It had always brought him back to the light, and he could sense great fear in the so-called Hero with no fear. Not fear for self never that, even in the darkest most terrifying battles he would willingly give his life for the cause, it was fear of losing something. Obi-Wan wasn't sure who, or what but he intended to find out. Slowly he turned and limped off, his arm slipping from Anakin's shoulders as he got further and further away.

Anakin watched him go before turning back around to face the senators. He looked at them uncomprehendingly at first, and then the expression cleared as he wrapped himself in an air of calm. This sea of tranquillity drove to protect the young Knight much more than calm him inside he was worrying. About Padmé. About Obi-Wan. All these un-Jedi feelings churned around inside him. Inside he was a storm. Outside he was the perfect Jedi, calm and composed. Now with a smile he finally understood his master's oldest teaching to him. 'Be who you are expected to be on the outside- always'. He cleared his throat.

"Right senators, Chancellor" he said, with a small incline towards the most powerful in the room. "If you would like to come this way". He spun around and strode off. Heading for the camp. It left the others no choice but to follow. He did not slow his pace or turn around until they got to the camps entrance, framed by the evergreen looking trees which had somehow survived the slaughter of the day's battles.

"Jedi Knight Skywalker" called out Satine, stumbling rather indignantly to catch up with the much taller man's longer strides. He turned in acknowledgement to her voice, not surprised by the title he had been given by her. While many in the senate preferred to call all members of the Jedi Knights upwards 'Master Jedi' those who were much closer to the Order did distinguish between the two. Padmé was one, although she did like to call her Ani a higher rank knowing that it pleased him. Satine, was, quite obviously another.

"Yes milady" he said politely, keeping the wall of calmness up and around him, but always holding it at arm's length in a similar way you would hold an angry cat. It was a part of him, and yet detached from him. He liked to feel way too much for any master's liking. Except, maybe Obi-Wan's. A ghost of a smile was playing on his face as he took in the duchess' obvious mistrust of Clone Troopers around them. One didn't need the Force to feel it.

"Your soldier's, you call them Clones" she said carefully they stood there waiting for the others to catch up before he nodded his affirmation.

"That is correct" he said cautiously, wondering what was coming next.

"Well if they are Clones of a human being that means that they have hopes and dreams and lives" She carried on diplomatically, gaining confidence as she saw Anakin smile encouragingly at her. Padmé looked at her friend curiously, wondering where this conversation was going.

"That's correct ma'am" he said, almost enthusiastically. "Some don't see it as that, but they are all separate human beings with their won hopes and fears and dreams and nightmares, it's our job, as generals I think to encourage individuality. They are not just soldiers" He looked at her, still curious at where the conversation was going but much more heartened that someone else, other than him his master and Padmé shared the belief in the clones leading normal lives during the war. They were not machines and nor should they be treated as such.

"But that is just it Master Jedi" she said, deciding that diplomatically it was so much better to place him on a pedestal. "You are breeding humans to die for an ideal which they have no cause to believe in" the look on Anakin's face looked crushed. "They have to live on a battlefield day in and day out needlessly watching their friends and colleagues die". She finished and glanced around for Padmé to give it to her. They were friends in the senate supporting each other's bills however the other senators face was curiously neutral. Undeterred Satine worked herself up into a hurricane, giving a speech which was so complicated Anakin doubted that even Obi-Wan could unpick it. It had undercurrents and passages swirling around in it. So many ribbons, fact and fiction, personal ideals and general morals all unravelling to different places, it was impossible to follow them all. However when she came to her conclusion Anakin discarded the half unpicked speech in his head and focused. "Surely it is much better to set droid upon droid, the other army draws back and yet you are no where nearer to finding the master minds behind as you were when it began". She paused and then said- "When I went to a sepre..." She never finished her sentence.

Anakin had pulled her up and slammed her into the tree trunk she had, until a few micro seconds ago been leaning on. He looked incredulously at her before drawing in close and whispering menacingly in her ear.

"What did you just say?" he asked. The sea of Tranquillity he had promised to keep around him quickly disappeared into a dark abyss. His eyes seared into her, but she couldn't break the gaze. She tried to move away, wrench herself from the dark man's grasp- but Anakin held firm. If his attention had been diverted he might have seen the sickly happy smile which had spread across the Chancellors face. But he didn't.

Neither did Padmé. She was momentarily shocked by her husband's behaviour. What was wrong? She looked around for help. But her eyes kept leaping back to the scene unfolding. She was all too aware that she was caught in the middle. Satine was her friend, the caring woman was the one who had encouraged her not to let Anakin go, to defy the Order and everything it more or less stood for. Anakin was, still is the love of her life. The one she had risked everything to be with. Siding with him would betray her friend. Siding with her would betray her husband. What could she do? A friend or a lover? A lover for a friend. All she wanted to do was scream at them and rip her hair out- but she couldn't. All she could do was watch and throw her hope and trust at the Force, hoping that it would be sorted out.

"I said" Satine said, putting all the authority she had into her voice and drawing herself up with dignity. "That I visited a separatist camp last week..." again she never finished her sentence as Anakin, kind and gentle Anakin had slammed her into a tree again. The duchess stifled a cry of pain.

"Why?" he asked her vehemently. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. The person who had been considered a friend, the only one outside of Anakin and Padmé who knew about their marriage, and was present as a witness. And also a close friend of his former master was, to all aspects a traitor. Or was she? It was this doubt which had caused him to behave like he was. As a Jedi he couldn't doubt. To doubt meant to fear. But this, almost hatred of doubt came from way before his initiation into the Jedi Temple. It was written into his very bones. He couldn't discard it no sooner than he could rip out his own heart. He needed to know the truth. Fast.

"I am neutral in this war" she said clearly, hatred for the very man opposite her coursing through her veins. She wanted to call Obi-Wan for help through the bond which they shared with each other but refrained. To call him now would reveal her friends' secrets. She couldn't do that, not yet anyway. There was still away out of it. "I am on neither side, therefore by visiting each camp I am therefore not a traitor" Anakin froze in place, his mind ticking over what she had said. It was true: her position or rather her status within the war was of neutrality. But both Anakin and Obi-Wan knew that there was no such thing as total neutrality. Shades of gray, yes. But not neutral. She was with them or us. Us or them. It was a never ending vicious circle which would only stop with either to surrender or total death of the losing side. She was looking down, ashamed of her behaviour or because she was scared of the storm in his eyes he could not tell.

Then she looked up into his eyes. And he leapt away from her. The storm in his heart turning to rain, it was raining in his very soul. Those eyes scared him. Not because they were angry or powerful. Far from it. He wasn't scared of her. But he was scared of himself. The way those eyes looked at him reminded him of being back at Watto's shop. Enduring another beating. The way the eyes glassed over. Unseeing. Submissive. Accepting the fate that was coming. He was better than that. Wasn't he? He tried to wrestle with himself. Trying to justify what he had done. But he couldn't. He couldn't even summon the courage to look back into those eyes. He was too ashamed of himself.

Satine having spent years of her life with Obi-Wan who, particularly in his teenage years had been quite volatile, and recently just after Qui-Gon had died he had come close to touching the dark side. After all this she was used to the mood swings of a Jedi. Her Obi had been like Anakin, except, from what she could gather from the Knights former master was that Anakin hated meditation, preferring to go to light sabre practice to let of his anger instead of releasing his anger into the Force as any good Jedi should have done. She felt sorry for Anakin. But then she was reminded of the bruises already forming on her back and stopped. But still the young man needed comforting he was clearly horrified at what he had done. She placed a placating hand on the Knight's shoulder. And finally Padmé found that she could finally move her legs enough to walk over to the pair of them.

"Satine?" she asked, worried about her friend. She was, needless to say worried about Anakin, but, knew somewhere in the deep recess of her mind that although her husband was deeply troubled he would be fine. Satine I wasn't so sure about.

"I'm fine Padmé" she said brightly. But this brightness didn't reach her eyes. It was fake. But Padmé didn't pushed her. She knew her friend better than to push. Slowly Anakin got to his feet from where he had been crouched. He attempts his trade mark grin. The one every boy in the Republic wished that they had. And the one which every girl longs to kiss. But it was wrong. It twisted his features. Not enhanced them. It made him look ugly. Not the beautiful charismatic Knight he was known to be. It made him look dark and hideous. And Padmé hated it. The Jedi Knight turned to the Chancellor. And bowed. Hiding his face from view.

"I'm truly sorry Chancellor" he said humbly. The way he would have once asked forgiveness from Watto, and, more recently from Mace Windu.

"Consider it forgiven Master Jedi". It wasn't the chancellor who spoke but Satine. Again Anakin attempted to grin at her. Again he failed, epically"

"My dear boy" the chancellor said, putting a hand on Anakin's shoulders. "We all make mistakes, your only human after all". This brought Anakin up short. No lecture. No beating. No punishment. With this realisation came relief and hope, it blossomed inside him. Cracking the darkness encasing his soul. It always happened when the chancellor was around. He could almost smell the dark side on him. Sticking and clinging to him. His words of forgiveness and Satine's heartened him. But he needed forgiveness from Padmé. His angel. His compass. The queen who fell for a slave boy and risked all to be with him. He knew what he put her through. The bond they shared though the Force told him how much he had hurt her. And also how scared she was, not of him. Anakin knew that. She would never be scared of him. But FOR him. It didn't make sense, not to him anyway, not to this situation. H quickly filed away the question to discuss with Obi-Wan at a later date.

"We are at war Master Jedi" The senator said calmly, her eyes and face betraying nothing. "You must do what you fell you must to ensure it ends soon". It wasn't forgiveness. Not even close. Anakin could feel the waves of disapproval rolling off of her. But it was acceptance. Acceptance that they must discuss this, not here, not now but back at home. But she wouldn't be leaving him. She was leaving a lot of her feeling unsaid and shying away from the gently probes at her mind. He had taught her it a long time ago to protect her from Dark Jedi, the Sith. Now it was being employed on him. What did that make him? Anakin didn't know the answer to this particular enigma. Anakin cleared his throat.

"Right so...er" he was going to introduce them to the camp but no his confidence failed him. He had always been confident. As a young boy it had been out of naivety. Now it was due to his ablilities, not only with a light sabre, but with his strange way of being able to charm most people. People just liked him. Amongst the Jedi he was considered many things: collegue, friend, teacher all these roles jumbling together. His preferred company was his master, with whom he shared a special bond. Outside of the Jedi environment he was admired and famous. Even only his mother was here to see it. Now, with that persona had gone. And he was the lost little boy from Tatooine, so far away from home. And yet a great responsibility had been placed on his shoulders. Shaking himself he began to improvise.

"This is the 501st camp" he said "So if you would like to follow me we shall go get something to eat at the mess hall before continuing". They nodded in agreement before setting off after him.

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><p><strong>Dun dun daaaaa so was it good or bad. Please review I know that it is a bit slow but a promise you that it is going to be going somewhere- I have so many ideas locked in my head that you might or might not see on paper but anyway- until next time- don't forget to review. <strong>

**from subaquakat  
><strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello again readers. Okay another longish chapter written while on the train cross country listening to music shuffle so please forgive me if I have flipped and changed moods a little bit. Thanks also the review given by **Jedi Master Misty Sman-Esay** **

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><p><strong>for the last chapter. In response i know that the films don't really explain the clones lives much, niether do the TV shows but I think that they must have a sense of self, and the way that they are different from everybody else, and yet the same as each other. Also, just by looking at Rex and Cody, the only two named clones in the show, and the way that they are developed as people could suggest that all clones are like this. Do you agree?<br>**

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><p>"The mess hall, if you could call it that, was little more than an extra large tent. Inside were a few makeshift gas rings and open fires for cooking the food. The Clones it in turns to cook and prepare the food, for the rest of the squadron the teams were normally about 7 or 8 at a time. Unfortunately it appeared there were only a handful of the clones in the entire 501st that had actually passed their exam in food tech. AS a result you were never entirely sure of actually how edible the food was. Outside the tent was a large open fire, the sort that Anakin, as a padiwan had sat around with the other younglings his age and toasted marshmallows on. Around the growing inferno of the blaze were makeshift chairs, these also differed in various degrees of quality depending on the war, how bad it was to the local environment, and also the development of the planet. Fortunately, this time, the scavengers had procured several decrepit looking armchairs which were strewn in a in a haphazard circle.<p>

"This is cosy" Satine said brightly, and it was, her view of the front line was worst than this. Behind her were murmurs of agreement from Padmé. Anakin checked his watch and cursed in Basic. He hadn't sworn in Huttese, or even used it for a long time. He had forgotten that his time piece had long since broken- its screen smashed and cracked having taken a laser bolt at the end of the previous year, he resorted to looking up in the sky. This was something all Jedi were supposed to be able to do, and be accomplished in. However he had never even been close to just understanding how to do it, resorting in the tests to guessing. Therefore he was thankful when, on his 13th birthday his master had given him a watch. It was a simple analogue watch, silver in colour with a gold ring around the face. There was no name etched on the watch face, instead a name, but the characters were illegible after the watches sustained time in the temple. This was according to his master, who said that it had been passed from master to apprentice until it had been passed onto Obi-Wan from Qui-Gon. The other Jedi masters resented it, saying that it was against the syllabus, but then, according again to his master they had said the same on his thirteenth birthday. And plus, like all the resentments held towards Anakin they never said anthing not to his, nor his masters face. This all left Anakin pondering the time. Suddenly it came to him. Not from the stars but from counting forward in his head from the last known time.

"The dinner bell is about to go" he said causally, trying to keep a light conversation going. The wall of calm was firmly up in position. Anakin Skywalker did not make the same mistake twice. Well, that's what he wanted to think anyway.

"We..." Satine stopped, clearly worried about contradicting the young knight again. She glanced at Padme for support who quickly took over.

"We ate just before we arrived" she said, taking in Anakin's confused expression she quickly clarified. "On the ship". The expression cleared back to a carefully maintained blank, unfeeling wall. It was the chancellor who spoke, giving them all a spook as they had momentarily forgotten he had existed, and was there alongside them.

"Senators you hardly ate anything, as chancellor I must insist you eat". The younger females looked at each other and shrugged, wishing to avoid another confrontation with anyone else in the group they set off towards the kitchens just as a bell rang out through the camp. It was a singular, almost solidarity beat at first, beating out a specific beat, then more joined in, a chorus of them. Their tunes weaved together, in and out of each other. There was a reason for this, doing a melody where no singular bell could be heard would make near impossible to replicate. It had happened before the dinner bell being replicated with disastrous consequences, both for the Clones and the Jedi involved. It wouldn't happen again.

As Padmé and Satine returned with their steaming disposable plates held in front of them, grimacing from the strange odour Anakin walked over to them with a clone right behind them. The clone's uniform was dirty and dusty from the day's battles and he had clearly patterned it with some yellow sort of markings.

"Senators" Anakin said he glanced at Cody who stiffened up to attention; he would stay like that during the whole conversation. "I'm going to check on General Kenobi" Anakin stated, surprising Satine slightly, surely after prior events it would have been better to meditate. Clearly Padmé didn't seem to surprised, and even enthusiastically agreed with him.

"Yes Master Jedi, go and bring news of the general back to us we are ALL deeply worried about him" she said, still the calm mask on her face didn't crack. She wasn't even looking at him but more at her friend. Even though she had put emphasise on the word 'all' it was clear to Anakin that he really meant her friend. Not that she wasn't worried about him, even Palpatine was, who had taken to staring at the scene with his eye brows knitted together, his face resting on his knuckles. Anakin once again bowed. Straightened and turned to Padmé. Beautiful kind Padmé and mouthed the word sorry to her. Then, his heart broke. She didn't answer. Her eyes registered nothing. On the inside he was crying on the out he was calm. He walked away through the monsoon of his soul. Fighting the storm of his heart. He walked away.

It took him less than 2 minutes to seek and located the medical tent, as soon as he entered the troops stood to attention. Bloody Clones.

"At ease" he growled out, he glanced around questionably at them. They mirrored his expression. God they were slow he thought savagely, not yet recovered from the anger he had felt coursing through is veins. He opened his mouth to clarify exactly why he was there when one of the clones jumped forward, obviously indentifying what the general was after.

"General Kenobi is through here sir" he said opening a flap which lead into another room. In reality it was just another, much smaller tent which was connected to the main one. Anakin scowled, he knew his master hated being treated different to everyone. And this was different. Normally the clones would be treated where they lie, broken after battle or in their tents, not so close to the medical bay.

"Thank you..." he trailed off, he made a point to name and try and remember all the names of his squadron. He knew there wasn't much point they died so frequently nowadays, their lives snuffed out like a candle, and new ones were coming through. This clearly was a new one, his polished uniform, new and shiny clearly done with the sole aim of pleasing his commanding officers. A fresh lamb for slaughter.

"Tarris sir" he said eagerly, then paused and remembered something from his training "CT 50678/45". Wow had the numbers really gotten that long; he remembered a time when there was only a few, four numbers at the most in a clones issue number. Rex and Cody were the only ones which remained of the original 501st all the others had either died in battle or declared unfit for service so forced to remain at a training centre training the next bunch to come through. One had been transferred to the medical corps- he was dead now too.

"Tarris" Anakin said lightly, Tarris looked shocked, and then smiled slightly holding the tents entrance flap open a little wider than before. Murmuring his thanks again Anakin stepped inside.

The tent was about the size of Anakin's room back at the temple. At one side lay his master on a couple of blankets strewn haphazardly on top of each other. On the other side was a large work bench, clearly used as of a few minutes ago as a strategic planning desk. Anakin quickly bowed his head over it, his hand going up to tuck his hair behind his ear so he could study it better. His eyes flicked over the lines made on the paper maps and also the data pads scattered about the desk. He frowned slightly, he features creasing up and he scribbled a couple of his own notes next to Obi-Wan's. For a second he felt slightly embarrassed about his untidy scrawl next to the small cramped neat handwriting of his master. Perfection was his standard. No more. No less. Anakin was the same- just his perfection was, on some things substandard. His handwriting was one. Meditation was another. A slow mumble diverted his attention from the maps to the man whom he come to see.

"Anakin" he said, slurring his words out of tiredness. Instantly the younger man was standing over him the Master.

"Master?" he asked, gently laying a hand on Obi-Wan's cheek and moving it down his face in the same way that Obi-Wan had done to comfort Anakin as a boy. In response Obi-Wan moved onto the edge of the makeshift bed. Anakin smiled slightly, his master always knew how to cheer him up. He lay next to him- careful not to crush him and buried his head into his shoulder as he felt Obi-Wan holding him. His arms moving up to give a firm grip on the broader shoulders of his padiwan.

No, he was more that. Nobody could ever describe the bond between a padiwan and a master, but he had fallen into the same trap his previous master had with his first apprentice. He had become attached instead of thinking of him as a brother he began to think of him as a son. He looked down proudly at his charge, still buried into him chest. His son.

"I've done a bad thing" Anakin mumbled pathetically into his chest, wounding like the ten year old boy who was always behind on his crèche work. This time his master knew it was much more serious. He could fell the darkness around his soul, the protective shields were up. The older master sighed wishing they could both go back to a time when there had been nothing which had been hidden by his padiwan. Before the war. Before Geonosis. Before death. Before the darkness had blossomed around them.

"Shh" Obi-Wan whispered, he was intently curious and eager to help with what was bothering him but he knew all he could do was calm Anakin down, the boy had quite successfully somehow managed to cradle even closer into him.

"Master?" he mumbled again and Obi-Wan closed his eyes. He hated Anakin calling him that. It might be his rank like 'sir' or 'ma'am' but he knew that to Anakin, at least in the early days had been a link to slavery. To the slavers and the owners. It suggested that he, Obi-Wan Kenobi had power over Anakin Skywalker. If only that was the case, then he might do as he is told Obi-Wan thought. He wanted to be able tell Ankin that they were equals in all but rank. But he never could. Because if he did he knew that Anakin would withdraw even more from him. Neither wanted anything to change. So here they were. Father and Son. Curled up on a makeshift bed snuggling together for comfort, protection, warmth and so many other things. Anakin had been his anchor in life when his compass had died, had made him realise that life had to go on. It didn't stop, for no one. Without him...Obi-Wan didn't want to think about it.

To Anakin his master was HIS compass. Before his first year of apprenticeship had ended, he would have said Qui-Gon was his father and Obi-Wan, snobby Obi-Wan was his evil brother. Now his master, his friend Obi-Wan was his brother-cum-father. His map through the darkness in his soul. But, more importantly he was a constant in his life right from the beginning of it. Slavery was in a different life, in a different storage box hopefully locked away forever along with the death of his mother. He had been there for the good and the bad times.

"Yes" Obi-Wan said slowly and sleepily.

"I want you to know that I'm sorry, I didn't hurt anybody". These words felt strange to Obi-Wan and he pulled the younger one in closer. The senators were forgotten.

"I know" he said comfortingly gently probing the bond for an answer. He was rewarded by a brief image of him holding a blonde woman to a tree. It was a perfect snapshot. Some things were in such sharp focus, like Padmé and the background, others were blurred, and the person who was quite easily supposed to be Palpatine was obscured and blurred by blackness. As was the blonde woman. Unfortunately Obi-Wan knew exactly who it was: Satine. The whole scene was stained in red. The colour of blood. The red of the Sith. The red of tragedy. As soon as he had registered all this, the picture was whisked away and replaced with...a brick wall. A classic block. Anakin was blocking his master. And Obi-Wan couldn't understand it and that hurt. Big time. Even more than the Jedi master would have thought it would. He retreated back into the present and gave Anakin a comforting squeeze. He will be there for him. As always. Now. Then. Forever. As long as he was able he would help his friend. This was the coherent thought he had before drifting back off to sleep. His arms still around Anakin. Who couldn't sleep.

He kept thinking about what had happened. He had blocked his master. He actually felt the need to block him totally. Sure he kept things from him, he always had been stronger than him in that sense, not that his master ever probed against his shields. Detentions had been blocked when he was little. Now things like his marriage and his anger were blocked from him. His talks with Palpatine. But never had he ever blocked his entire mind off. He had just pushed his only flash light out of the darkness swirling around in his soul away. Even Padmé couldn't help, not because she couldn't, Anakin was certain she could but because he was scared to admit his feelings to anyone. He just couldn't. He didn't, wit Obi-Wan he did it through letting down certain wards when meditating, and they would discuss it all through meditation as well. He snuggled closer to Obi-Wan. His master. His teacher. His father. He would face the consequences in the morning he thought. Then he drifted off to sleep. They lay there, snoring. Together, master and apprentice wrapped up as equals.

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><p><strong>Hello again there. So there was so much angst for Anakin over the past chapters I really wanted to end it on a highish not but also explore his relationship with Obi-Wan at the same time, as you can see it is already crumbling at the foundations and Obi-Wan and Anakin are desperatly trying to keep it together but by not talking to each other are seriously failing. Please let me know if I have gone out of character with any of them I really want to know. So hit that little button down there are please review <strong>

**Thank you**

**Subaquakat  
><strong>


	7. Chapter 7

**hello again reader sorry for the wait of *gasp* 5 days i'm so sorry might have been something to do with the Royal Wedding and the parties which entailed from it. hope everyone else had fun even if they weren't from the UK. So anyone here it is another chapter, a bit shorter this time and again written on the train so i know it is a little weird but hey i'm sure weird is okay. So without further ado...what...oh yh i forgot disclaimers: i don't own star wars George Lucas does but the story line is mine. there we have it...on wards we journey. **

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><p>They were found an hour later by Cody, two worried senators and a Chancellor, still curled together and deeply asleep. At peace with the world.<p>

"Generals" Cody whispered through the flap of the tent, when there was no response he looked at the chancellor and internally sighed. "They are ready to see you" he said. What else could he say? If he said that they weren't he would be disobeying strict orders from Skywalker to go and find him after the tour. However if he woke Kenobi like he undoubtedly would in his quest for the wayward general they he would be disobeying the medical staff. Sometimes you just couldn't please everybody he thought. He put his fingers to his lips to signal silence turned and walked through the flap-cum-door followed by the politicians. And there they were, sleeping in the same makeshift bed they had fallen asleep on, curled together.

Padmé clapped her hands over her mouth to keep herself silent. Even the small quick breaths from her friend seemed to loud compared with the calm silence in the room only broken by the slow deep breaths of the two Jedi. They looked over at Cody not sure of what they were going to ask to find him gone, retreating through the flap in the tent. Slowly they turned back to the scene in front of them. The two senator moved closer together so as to talk freely without waking them.

"Should we wake them?" Satine's Mandalorian accent sounded next to her ear, her breath tickling her neck. She shook her head.

"They were injured, they need to relax" she breathed back, her crisp clear Nubian accent contrasted magnificently with the softer, more subtle tones of her Mandalorian counterpart. To her the sight was incredible, she wanted to take a holo and treasure it forever. Though to use as a mocking tool or to store in her memories she wasn't certain. All her life (for she couldn't remember a life without Anakin in it) she had watched the young boy grow and mature, but to also struggle with the anger and betterment locked deep in his heart. Anger about his mother, from whom he was untimely, ripped. Anger for the death of Qui-Gon, the father he had never known. Anger for just being so angry. It was a vicious circle which one would appear never to escape from. Then at the start of the clone wars memories held by him of his mother, warped and damaged from the horrific way in which she had died. And, also, though he would never admit it, the nightmares from battle. She had been through it, watching him. But it saddened her that the cheery boy they had picked up at Watto's shop, so full of joy and life had appeared to implode in what? It was too soon to tell. She had watched and done nothing. But his master had been through it all with him, not heard it from the chancellor like she had, young and immature she had tried to run from the emotions which had kept her anchored to the boy. To Anakin. His master had helped him settle into being a Jedi; he had been the brother the boy had never had, calmly taking all that he could in his stride. He too was young, but unlike she had been, he had matured beyond his years. He had not run. She had. To her, he had desperately wanted to be forgotten as the little boy. But to his master he didn't, or maybe he just recognized that he couldn't. Now there was proof, in front of her that the boy from Tatooine did still exist.

Satine had witnessed many traits from Anakin, and had heard about even more. First and foremost there was the friend, fiercely loyal and kind. It was by watching him and his simple, yet strangely philosophical ideals which told her to go back to Obi-Wan. Then there was the general, scheming and merciless towards his enemies. He was the one executing the plans, the strategic planner and the passion he showed reflected on his troops. And last of all there was the Jedi, cool, calm and collective and then the raw emotion behind this wall which was carefully managed. The teacher, laughing and joking with the younglings, knowing everyone of them by name, helping padiwans sneaks out of class, all these exploits relayed to her from his master. But this, this was new, this was THE Anakin, pure and simple, safe from the anger, the death, the blood, from life, being protected by his master. His father.

"I know your there" a voice said, coming from the two huddled on the floor and after another pause Obi-Wan stirred. Not relinquishing his grip on Anakin, just shifting into a more comfortable position. He was determined not to wake the boy. No the man, for he was nearly 20. Asleep in his arms but failed because he immediately started squirming.

"Master" he said slowly, sounding so much like the disgruntled boy having to get up for theory classes, but had a hint of worry within him.

"It's fine" Obi-Wan reassured him, noticing the way his hand had instinctively gone to the hilt of his light sabre hilt. He caught the hand and withdrew it into the folds of another hug. "We have visitors" he explained in his through the force bond he shared with Anakin. He had once tried to explain it to Satine as a sort of breath in his head to where another being was attached. It was essential to maintain this bond and keep it strong, but, like a well kept rose bush it also had to be trimmed else the bush would get wider, taking it much more space in his head. This had happened before with master and apprentices, often causing the latter to go to the dark side once their master had died. This had almost happened with himself. Almost. But it had also taught him a lesson. Death was an inevitable part of life held in any position across the galaxy the best anyone could do was plan for it, so as to keep those left behind from pain. All he could do was hope that he had succeeded- at least a little bit.

"Let me guess, senators?" Anakin thought back sending a picture of Amidala and Satine into his head. Still being wrapped up he felt his master nod against him. He squeezed his master slightly, one last time, and got up, turning and pulling Obi-Wan to his feet. He turned to the waiting senators.

"Sainte" Anakin said slowly, lifting the shield back up in front of him, he addressed the senator in front of him.

"Master Jedi" she said coldly, addressing his shoulder as opposed to his eyes. She couldn't look at them; she glanced at Obi-Wan who just gave her a measured gaze, eying her up and down before turning to the other senator.

"Senator Amidala" he said formally bowing, but in the confines of the room his head very nearly touched her shoulder.

"Master Kenobi" she greeted hoping to get the formalities done and out of the way. Not that she disliked them, formality went hand in hand with public life as a senator but here, where she was surrounded by friends she'd rather not be elevated into any position of hierarchy.

"Sorry about the intrusion" Satine said, fidgeting nervously Obi-Wan could barely blame her, he was on e of the few councillors who hadn't had the wrath of Anakin bearing down on them but that didn't mean he wasn't ignorant, he knew of the darkness in Anakin's heart.

"That's okay" Obi-Wan said warmly, trying to increase the woman's confidence.

"It was my fault" Anakin blurted out without thinking after a few seconds of awkward silence. It was something he could never stand. Everyone looked at him. 1...2...1...2, Anakin counted in his head matching it with the rhythm his watch once played out. "I...told Cody to come and find me as soon as the tour was over" he stammered slightly going red, he couldn't believe it, the first moment of weakness in a long time and it was Padmé who had to see it. Why? He thought he glanced at her smiling at him, he mentally rolled his eyes. His master looked at him arching an eyebrow in amusement at the sight of his padiwan blushing and showing a bit of humility, it wasn't something many saw in the famous Anakin Skywalker.

"So how was the tour?" Obi-Wan asked casually directing the attention from his former apprentice onto him.

"Eye opening" Satine replied stiffly, it was as though she was trying to act normally with fellow senators however to Anakin and Padmé, who were used to acting secretively, it was a little too frank to be normal. "I am aware of many things which I am now"

"Like?" Anakin couldn't stand waiting for someone to say words, in his opinion it was better to be frank and say it has it is rather than beat about the bush. His lack of patience got a disapproving look from both Padmé and his master. Typical. They appeared to always agree on his short coming and what they were.

"These are things I wish to discuss with my people first" Satine replied coolly looking straight at Anakin, they held the gaze for a moment before the young Jedi looked away again; still ashamed over what had happened. Obi-Wan nodded in agreement along with Padmé, letting her continue. "I also have other matters concerning me generals" she paused, looking horrified at what she said before turning her back to the men she had just addressed. "Excuse me please" she said quickly moving out of the tent, not quite quickly enough to stop Obi-Wan hearing the sob breaking out from her composure and ripping its self out of her throat. The two Jedi looked at each other before the older; more senior went to follow her. Then still, frozen solid by the serious misjudgement he had just undertaken in his mind. He wasn't allowed. Not by the Jedi. Not by the senate. Not by Satine. So, although it pained his heart he remained stationary instead letting Padmé be the one to comfort her.

He racked hi head to try and find a reason for this strange behaviour, she never cried, not during the civil war which stripped her of authority and placed her as a criminal, not when they departed from each other even though their hearts were still joined. Not ever. Why now? Finally his eyes set on his padiwan standing shell shocked in front of him, or beside him his hands outstretched in front of him but for what? Protection? Apology? Fear?

"I think you should go Anakin" Obi-Wan said, slowly and quietly, keeping a carefully maintained balanced voice. The same could not be said for Anakin whose wall of calm was once again gone. Replacing it was remorse. A raw emotion so powerful it overwhelmed the older man for a moment. Then it was gone, and its place was bitterness, this wasn't Anakin's emotion but his own generated from the remorse flowing through him. It was strange, and was quickly dispelled into the Force.

"Yes master" he said in a carefully maintained balanced voice.

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><p><strong>okay so as you can see repurcussions already happening, are master and apprentice going to drift apart? is this why vadar became what he did? I don't know not until i write more anyway and get to that part. So as useal please R+R and have a great week...oh and also today is offically star wars day so May the fourth be with you :D<strong>


	8. Chapter 8

**Forbidden Love of a Jedi chapter 8**

**So as you can see I have actually changed the chapter 8 purely because there was no where left for the story to go, and if I am honest I felt as a writer revisiting it I had to change it and thus progress with what is hopefully going to be an interesting story.**

**Please review as I am working towards my DofE (like eagle scout for british scouts) and desperately need others like you readers to give constructive criticism would be marvellously brilliant.**

**Claws2501**

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><p>Anakin very carefully walked out, pushing past his wife with a sense of indifference, feeling nothing he had reasoned was better than the swirling shame and anger. If he had said this to Obi-Wan he knew his master would have said the emotion Anakin displayed was 'entitlement' rather than indifference, a sense of superiority that- although known to the Jedi through its aristocrats- was very carefully untangled through diplomacy classes and team exercises. Back straight he ignored the way the Clones stood to attention for him, the way that a couple of the 'shinies' saluted him, to the clones he was the exemplary general. A general- Anakin had quickly realised- was not the same as a Jedi. However the line had since become blurred until even Obi-Wan wasn't sure what part of him was general or Jedi.<p>

As he reached the edge of the camp, and took a deep breath attempting to focus on the Force, the familiarity of its depths and the way it instantly came to his command soothed and calmed him. It's mysterious nature called up the challenger in his personality and he had resolved long ago to unlock more secrets to its power than any Jedi before him. He groaned despite everything, and hesitated as he took the final steps to where he knew he would find the senator Obi-Wan wished he apologised to, the anger he felt when Satine had announced he had visited a Separatist camp he still felt justified too, and really they were in a war zone after all! He wasn't aware of himself as his legs carried him towards one of the smaller camp fires- already abandoned by the clones in favour of more warmth inside. He sat down, staring into its fiery depths. Fire he could understand, the warmth and love of the fire at home, the fear of its destructive path as it tore through hovels, and its practicality. He had never been very good at meditation, preferring to relinquish his anger through exhaustion on a kata exercise, but the fire and its every changing colours did allow him to focus on something else, allowing his mind to slowly open up as it always did when he flew through combat. Through his semi, almost juvenile form of meditation he felt his thoughts centre on, or rather around, two important figures in his life: Obi-Wan and Satine. The former was much easier to deal with than the latter. The former, his master, his friend, understood his anger, he had once felt it after all, and was more than willing to admit that sometimes his own emotions clouded his judgement. Anakin knew that he would forgive him… eventually. The latter was a senator, and although Anakin was good at reading Padme, her friend appeared to be much more closed- almost complicated- in the number of layers that made her up. She was a pacifist and yet wasn't one to shirk from a fight, but she had to agree it would be the right one. Yet she was good friends with a distinguished General, and had already proven that she would go through any lengths to protect his word against others. She had a past that even the archives hadn't fully detailed, and every time he met her his opinion of her changed.

"General" a voice cut through his thoughts like a sabre. Anakin tore his gaze away from the fire, and for some moments black dots danced in his vision as he tried to make out the figure in the darkness. He had of course recognised the voice of Fett- the voice of the clones- but he had not recognised the person he had belonged to and that made him nervous. With one hand on his light sabre Anakin stood up, pushing his general attributes to the forefront of his character.

"Whats your name trooper?" It was phrased like a question, however Anakin's voice made it seem more like a drill command, the effect was immediate on the clone as he adjusted himself to stand to attention and looking straight past Anakin, giving his general complete control and command.

"CT 5067/005" and for a moment Anakin was startled that the numbers had actually got that high, he had never paid attention before, knowing names of each individual gave them identity that allowed them to think creatively as the humans they were, but also allowed them not to be able to measure casualties of the rest of the galaxy- focussing rather on just one regiment: 501st, still it made him think that apart from his two captains there were few that were left from the original regiment on Genonosis. He searched his memory, curious due to not recognising the number.

"Regiment?" Anakin snapped in impatience when the clone didn't elaborate, and noticed that the trooper appeared to be able to stand even more to attention that before. A small part of Anakin was pleased: a clone should be mildly worried of his commander after all.

"502nd" The trooper replied snappily. Anakin nodded, finally understanding why he didn't recognise the clone: the 502nd was largely stationed on the core systems, allowing the senate direct control over at least a platoon of soldiers. Why the senate had wanted the clones when they had practically begged the Jedi to take control was anyones guess, but if current rumours that were going on through Anakin's own men were true: the senate simply didn't trust the Jedi enough to give them full control. This trooper had to be part of the Chancellor's body guard Anakin reasoned, with growing reassurance. The grandfatherly man had always been there for him since he had been brought to the Jedi Temple as a boy, and had always mirrored Anakin's viewpoint on some of his less popular beliefs about certain Jedi and their rules. He was quick to sooth and never asked for retribution from Anakin's actions, yet despite this he still considered the chancellor a mentor- a constant in the ever changing galaxy which he had been thrust into by the late Qui-Gon Jinn.

Anakin pushed past the clone, not even noticing the way he forgot to give him an order to carry on his duty. His ego had once again taking control and seeking the cool balm that was the Chancellor. Carefully placing his shields in place so as to speak to him without his master being privy he sat down opposite the old man who appeared- to all extents and purposes- mediating and blind to the world. The younger man pondered for a moment, unsure what to do. He was surprised to find that the Chancellor followed the Jedi in the ways in which to calm himself, and slightly angry that even a non force sensitive could follow the instruction when he: the supposed Chosen One could not even reach the Force like some senior initiates could, and some that had even gone to the AgriCorps. He closed his eyes briefly, trying to understand why the Chancellor could reach a level of peace that he couldn't. True he was a senator and so would have a higher level of control over his emotions, and he knew parts of the Jedi code and the Sith code- but no more than what was taught to the highest initiates when his master had been a padawan. He sat still, option to just wait out the Chancellors peace exercises and wait to be acknowledged.

"Anakin" He voice sounded thin and papery, his shoulders slumped as he came out of the level of peace that he had held and once again the young Jedi was overcome with anger at the Sith for causing this man he trusted to be at a loss with the world. He knew better than anyone the level of regret that each death- civilian, clone or Jedi- cost him and how his resolve always seemed stronger as more and more tragic news came from the front. Yet here was prove that the war was wearing him down and once again Anakin needed to remind himself of how old Palpatine was and how he had served longer than any other in the seat of Chancellor for the Republic.

"Chancellor" Anakin replied, trying not to let on how much he had noticed about his mentor's appearance- instinctively knowing that it would be rude to comment on it, and possibly wound the older man more. The chancellor took in Anakin's demeanour and smiled broadly at him. This was not his normal smile of greeting, not the one used whenever the adolescent Anakin had gone to visit him, this was the smile reserved for when he got his way with a particular politician or, sometimes even after a visit from Mace Windu or even Yoda. Anakin shivered, squirming as the chancellor glowed at him- the cat who got the cream. His normal, friendly features twisted almost beyond recognition. Every time Anakin saw it he was reminded of a spider, already knowing that the fly in the web he had weaved was caught and ripe for the feast. "I…. er…." Anakin trailed off from the apology he knew he should be giving, after all separatist aligned or not technically the Duchess of Mandalore was a member of the senate and under the Chancellors and the Jedi care. Once more he flashed back to his Master and his teachings, maybe Obi-Wan had been right originally and he was too old to train.

"Never doubt your abilities Anakin" the chancellor spoke again, smiling in amusement as Anakin started, unsure of how the Chancellor had read him so obviously.

"How" He started, and was reminded once more of his mentor's uncanny ability to read and manipulate others to his bidding. He was skilled at his job but Anakin knew deep down that the Chancellor was also playing his games with him, he had known after watching Padme small talking with other politicians: slowly stroking their egos as you would a tiger- with reverence and caution. He watched how the politicians responded to it and was always reminded of the way Palpatine stroked and stoked his own egotistical ideals, and his passion against and for others. The truth was both Obi-Wan and the Chancellor knew him better than Anakin did himself. Why keep going back to get manipulated? For the strength and feeling of power it provided afterwards- the power over others and as a testament to how far he had risen from such humble beginnings. Very unJedilke behaviour his Master had once chastised him for after feeling the dangerous emotions through his bond once. He wasn't going to make the same mistake again and have Obi-Wan find out about his true feelings towards the Chancellor.

"Anakin I have known you since you were a boy, I have watched you go from your unfair beginnings and tentative steps into battle to saved your loved ones" The Chancellor paused to allow for the desired effect: a reminder that Anakin wasn't a conventional Jedi. "Please don't be offended when I can see into your heart's doubts and desires". Anakin laughed, waving his hand in a way to allow the Chancellor to know he wasn't offended but merely surprised. Palpatine looked cooly back at Anakin, to him the emotional whelp had been almost too easy to bring into line with where the Sith needed him to be. The Jedi- as blind as they were could not see this boys potential to the Sith and how the emotion- so much that even Palpatine was weary of unleashing its full power- could make him a very powerful dark Jedi. "I have no doubt that you deserve your place amongst the very highest of Jedi ranks, and if I, or the Republic can help further your position then the people would not hesitate to act for the hero with no fear and even more importantly the hero of my home planet Naboo. The younger Jedi nodded, basking in the praise despite being mildly surprised at the way that the Chancellor so openly stated that he could control the council to do his bidding, but recognising that it was not far from the truth.

Watching the exchange, hidden due to a thin tree line Obi-Wan was crouched, the truth was he was desperate to know that his former padawan would actually give an attempt at an apology for the way he treated the Duchess. Internally he was torn between that of being the Jedi Master he should be- gently reprimanded Anakin but ultimately ensuring an apology to ripping his head off for even considering Satine a traitor. Instead here he was talking through his problems with Palpatine and not himself, him who he thought Anakin had considered family. It hurt him more than he was willing to admit and brought him to the quick conclusion that he still hadn't fully sorted out his attachment issues where his former padawan was concerned.

"Obi?" Satine asked nervously from behind causing him to spin round, his features lighting up immediately, banishing his and Anakin's problems to the back of his mind he looked over his wife and smiled with contentment. She walked up to him, carefully she drew a hand out and stroked his face and Obi-Wan was painfully reminded that this was their first meeting together since he had decided to throw caution to the winds and proclaim his love for her. Everything was still new to the couple, and with little in the way of experience they found themselves stumbling through a hidden minefield, not entirely sure what to do but still somehow finding a safe path. Suddenly without warning she threw her arms around him, ignoring the way in which his hard kevlar armour dug painfully into her skinny frame. Not for the first time Obi-Wan wished he was as confident as Anakin to be able to just wear a normal tunic, but then- unlike Anakin- Obi-Wan had someone depending on him to not die.

"Its ok" he murmured, stroking her silky hair, trying to calm her down as she started hysterically sobbing into the only tunic part of his get up she could find. "Its ok Satine, c'mon you know your not a traitor" Obi-Wan tried helplessly, and again cursing his former padawan for his actions. "He wouldn't hurt you really".

"Obi its not that" Satine started, causing Obi-Wan to stop his thought process and hold her even tighter. He tried to sense her emotions through the Force and was shocked to find the cloud of positive emotions: excitement, happiness, anticipation, all interlaced with a fear that was somehow connected to him, all pointing to the idea that whatever had happened Obi-Wan would not like for a second. "Obi, I'm pregnant" she states.


End file.
